WHEN INTERNET BADASSES ATTACK…

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The Internet is an amazing invention. It is also, unfortunately the breeding ground for intenet badasses. You know them. You’ve seen their posts. The warriors of the web, the vikings of video games, the martial artists of mama’s basement, the fighters of Facebook, the titans of Twitter… they are super badasses from beyond the touch screens. Feeling safe, they indulge in discourse that would result in shame, involuntary defecation, and possible hospitalization if they tried them in the real world. Too often, such toads escape any real-world consequences… but not always. Savor the sweet virtual aroma of desperate backpedaling for the sake of career and avoiding possible jail time. Enjoy the transition of Pat Dussault from internet badass to ardent apologizer…

Yes. Pat threatened a little girl. He thought it was a good idea to go after *this* little girl.

Apparently, James Woods was quick enough on the draw to tag the Secret Service. God bless him.

I don’t know what happened between the Pat’s original tweet and his follow up. I’d like to think there was a meeting involving his supervisor, his supervisor’s supervisor, and the company’s legal department, which reduced his internal monologue to some variation of this:

“S**t! F**k! F**k! S**t! F**k me! I’m f**ked! F**k! S**t! Did he say prison? F**k no! I don’t want to get s**t-f**ked! F**k! F**k! S**t! Yes! Yes! I’ll do whatever you tell me! Yes! F**k! Please don’t fire me or f**k my s**t! Please!”

Look at that. He’s using the emotionally distraught defense just like… who was that other walking diaper stain? Oh, yeah Peter Fonda! Sorry there, Canada moppet, this isn’t the first off-the hinges tweet you had, and why do you care what we do at our borders anyway? This isn’t about kids for you, this is about hating Trump, his administration, and his supporters.

I can’t be the only one that got a kick out of this. It’s nice to see the other side tap out for a change.

What do I know? I’m Justa Gaibroh.

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